Change can be a good thing

I stopped writing several months ago due to a situation in my life. I could not write, in fact I did not journal and I have been journaled for years.

Through the last 6 months God has done an amazing work in my life. He has changed me, healed me and carried me through a very difficult and life altering situation. (more on that to come)

There have been a lot of changes in me, some of the best changes in my life. They have also been some of the hardest changes in my life, but change is a good thing when that change is done by God. In fact sometimes the hardest changes that we go through end up giving us the things in life that God wants us to have.

I am writing again, it is a process and I will be posting more to this blog site and will also be updating this site.

This is a new journey that I am on and I am very excited about it, I hope you join me.

Much love
Tracy

The world of Robotics (A Mothers Heat Part VI)

My son has been involved in the robotics program at Davidson High School for four years. It has been an interesting experience. First off I never knew that it was such an interesting competition. They create a company, market a robot that is designed to perform specific tasks; they design, create and build the robot.

Now, this year of course was special because it was the last year. You see my husband and I have helped in different ways throughout the past four years. Honestly I have considered these wonderful kids my children. We even joke about how during robotics I have around forty plus children.  This year there were a total of eight seniors on the team, for these eight they all wanted to end with a bang. In the four years that we have been involved with robotics these eight have experienced placing in the top three at both the local and regional level, but never a first place at both.

This year my husband and I had decided that we were going to be at both competitions to support our son and the team.

The Local Competition:

The team was so excited. They did such a wonderful and swept the competitions with an overall First place and first place in “Spirit and sportsmanship” which I might add they have never won. Now, spirit and sportsmanship was an award that my son really wanted the team to win and he was so very excited. As for me, I was so very proud of each of them.

After, the local win the team had just a few weeks to get ready for the regional level. Our team would work hard to prepare. After winning first place at the local level they wanted to do the same thing at the regional level.  So they prepare for Auburn.

The Regional Competition:

We traveled to Auburn University. The team set up the display and prepared. The competition was stiff and at the end of the day none of us were sure where our team would place. As the awards were called out we won several but it seemed as no one team was scoring in across the board in the different categories. So, it came down to the top award, the overall award. They called out the third place, then second place and our name was not called. Our team thought they did not place. Then the announcer called out Davidson High School as the “First place” winner. My kids did it for the first time for these wonderful seniors they brought home the first place trophy from local and regional robotics competition. They were so very excited.

I loved seeing my son’s face after four years the team ended on top. It was great.

As a mother there were times during these past four years that issues came up and to be honest I wanted to just jump in and fix the problem or issue. Now, mind you when it came to issues of design or math there was nothing I could do. As mother’s we all want to protect, defend and do something when there is an issue, truth is as difficult as it is we must allow our children to experience the difficult. Over these past four years I have had to allow him to experience defeat, and even experience failure not because I wanted to but because it would help him to grow. On the upside because both my husband and I were involved we were able to see him grow and experience victory. He and his other teammates experienced what teamwork, and hardwork can accomplish.

 

I’m Back

The past three weeks have both great and difficult all at the same time. First off I got sick, and for two weeks tried to cure it myself. Well, let me just say that did not work. I finally went to the doctor and was given a shot, a round of antibiotics and cough medicine. The physician told me I had bronchitis and a severe sinus infection. Now that was on Monday, on Wednesday I was offered a new position at work, which I excepted.

So, as you may have guessed, I have been dealing with sickness, I still have a small cough but feeling much better. I have also been training and getting use to my new position. Oh, let me also mention that my family and I are also helping our dear friends with a new church start. So, these reasons have been why I have not written in a few weeks.

Now that things have settled down I will be writing again and continuing with both of the series that I started, A Mother’s Heart and Insecurity.

So, look forward to another post this weekend.

Love and have missed you all.

My Best Gift Ever (A Mother’s Heart Part VII)

His first week home

Eighteen years ago today God blessed me and my husband with one of the best gift ever, my son.

I remember the day he was born like it was yesterday. I was in labor off and on all day long. We ended up going to the hospital around 4 pm on February 11, 1994.  For what seem to me as a long time it was just me and Ron. Ron had been calling my mom who had gone to see the movie “Schindler’s list”. Therefore she got there around midnight but she did not miss much because my labor at that time was moving very slow. As you may have guessed it did pick up.

My son was born at 6:26 am on the morning of February 12, 1994. I recall the physician saying something and then I asked what she said. She then told me that there was a loose knot in his umbilical cord. For a moment I was concerned then she said don’t worry it was loose and he is fine. My husband then leaned down and began telling me how much he loved me then said “you did it baby you gave me a son”. I have always found that line so very funny considering that he was the one who decided the sex of our son. It was right after that my mom was standing at the door of the delivery room crying. She later told me that the song “You are so beautiful” was playing on the radio. It was truly one of the happiest days of my life.

Two days later on Valentine’s Day Ron and I brought home this beautiful baby boy 6lbs 12in and 191/2 inches long. I told Ron this is the best Valentine’s Day present that I will ever receive.  Now you know why I call him my heart, it is because it was the Valentine’s Day heart that I received in February 1994.

 

Today as I write this I look at my son and see a young man where my baby use to be and wonder where did the time go. I can hardly believe that it has been 18 years since God brought this wonderful young man into my life. I am truly blessed and honored to be his mother.

Son, you have and always will be my heart. I love you more than I ever thought I could love. I am so very proud of you. You are a wonderful young man with so much love and potential. I look forward to continuing to watch you grow. I am so glad that God gave me you. Love Mom

Mothers,

Treasure your babes they grow up so fast. Love your babes God entrusted them to your care and that is a true gift from God.

 

Are you ready to change (Insecurity Series Part 2)

Insecurity, you have to admit the word really does not even sound good. Insecurity also plagues many of us weather we want admit it or not. One of the main problems with insecurity is that it will continue to affect your life until you are ready to deal with and make the change from insecurity to security.

In Beth Moore’s book “So Long Insecurity” I find it very interesting that the title of the first chapter is “Mad Enough to Change”. In truth that is the truth until we get mad enough not to allow insecurity to run our life and change we will stay the same.  Now I have dealt with insecurity for a good portion of my life and over the years have dealt with pushed it down and then allowed it back in however, today I am ready to get rid of it for good, not just layers but for good.

For many women we try to find security in men. The problem is that our security in ourselves and in our womanhood cannot come from men. I love how Beth says it “Nothing is more baffling than our attempt to derive our womanhood from our men.” Men and women are different and handle their insecurities in different fashions, let’s face it women are typically more emotional than men. For many years I tried to find my security in men. My parents divorced when I was eight and to be honest for many years I lived in fear of my Dad mainly because during my parents’ marriage there were a lot of arguments. In fact, from an early age I learned to walk on egg shells. So, when I grew up and started dating I tried to find the security that I did not necessarily get in my childhood in the different relationships, which was a huge mistake. Ultimately this did nothing but cause my insecurity to be worse.

Now, please understand it is not just men that women try to find security in we also try to find it in those around us, like friendship. Friendships would be another area that I have tried to find security in. For me trying to find security in friends is setting that person and our self up for a fall, which can hurt or even ruin a friendship. I have some that have had to be restored and some that still lay in ruin. Insecurity hurts, it can hurt you and it can hurt others.

Now, I am going to write something that you will see written in this series many times. Our security needs to be grounded in Christ. If we are secure in Christ the rest will fall into place.

So, my question to you is this; are you ready to walk away and leave behind the stronghold of insecurity? Are you tired of it running your life? Understand these questions cannot be answered by anyone else other than you.

I look forward to your comments or questions.

Tracy

I’m tired of insecurity (Security Series)

One of my favorite Bible teachers and author is Beth Moore. She has written a book called “So Long Insecurity”, which happens to an issue that I have had to deal with all my life. So, when I decided to begin reading the book, I was not expecting that God would have me blog about this subject (at least not yet). But, here I am and I feel like that is exactly what God wants me to do.

I have really been hesitant about starting mainly because this is such a sensitive subject for me. For me I started out very young having security issues and it did not help that I carried it over into my adult life. Now, I would love to say that insecurity is completely behind me but it is not, it is something that I have continued to work through. The more I thought about me and the difficult time I have with insecurity I figured I am probably not alone. In fact I know that I am not. It also made me think of some questions.

Why do so many women have a difficult time with insecurity?

Why do we continually try to find security in so many different places?

Why do we tend to believe the world verses trusting that our security, worth and value should be found only in Christ?

I welcome all comments and look forward to you joining me on this journey. I don’t know about you but I am tired of insecurity. My desire is to draw closer to Christ and to be able to rest in the security that only Christ can provide.